gin......

I'm slightly drunk.
So I'm blogging in the interest of self-knowledge, so I can re-read this in the morning.
Tonight my friend Brittany and I (Brittany is the one redeeming factor of my short stint as a bookstore girl), went to the Crocodile Cafe for a "listening party" of...well, hell, I can't remember, but it's by the Flaming Lips and it's four CDs meant to be played at the same time.
It was awesome, of course.
But it was weird to be back in the Crocodile Cafe, a place I haven't been for a year---and the last time I was there was for the "goodbye show" of a friend's band, and also a personal goodbye for me as I let go of all the feelings I had harbored for this kid for two years of my college life.
Oh, how much can change in a year. Really, you have no idea, and I'm not going to tell you. Last year was my 21st year, and I nicknamed it "the year of firsts". I'll leave it at that.
But, here I am, now 22 and doing so many things for the second time around. And it feels different, of course, to layer the past with the present, to compare them and realize that I keep changing and my life keeps changing and I can't stop or control it. I'm hoping I'm learning something, anyway. Even though I know at some point I'll have to un-learn it.

Anyway, my bag of microwave popcorn is empty now, and I'm going to bed.