the things that don't make sense.

Oh, the complicatedness of life. And faith. Dr. Wall doesn’t do it justice.

I’ve been reading up a little on Jewish ideas of the messiah. It’s not a simple topic. And in a sense, it is a heartbreaking one. To actually read the accounts—the gathering of the exiles, the recognition of Israel’s God by all the earth, the fruitfulness of the ground, the end of war, long days of peace and prosperity, maybe even a new kind of existence where pain and death do not exist—to read such things, and to think of the thousands of years that have passed since they were written… It reminds of a paper I wrote last year, about how the traditional placement of Eden is in Iraq. Such beautiful visions, so very far away. Is the kingdom near? How can it be?

Obviously, there is much more to Judaism than messianic expectations. But, even without a messiah figure, there is still a strong hope for the gathering of the scattered and the exiled, for life on the land that was promised, for peace and fullness and fulfillment. Surely a good God who gives good things to His children would give these things to His people.

But the history of the Jews isn’t pretty. And the fact of Jesus hasn’t seemed to help them out much. You could argue the reverse, even—look how much persecution has come straight from the hands of Christians, with the convenient reason, “The Jews killed Jesus!” How ironic, if Jesus did see himself as the Jewish messiah, that such things should go on in his name. Can you call such things the birth pangs of the messiah? Or are they just the fucked-up actions and incredible cruelty of men? Of “Christians”.

So what does “Christian” even mean? What does it mean for us to call Jesus the messiah? Messiah for whom? And does our religion have anything to do with anything Jesus actually said or taught or did?

The more I read, the more I see, the more I wonder if the answer is no.